money

• I recognize that right now I need to be obsessive about money. Obsession uses spoons.
• I hate feeling like I need to be obsessive about money. Hate uses spoons.
• I carefully crafted a plan to cover from now until November 6. Careful crafting uses spoons.
• Even though I have a plan, I feel like my money situation is out of control. Out of control uses spoons.
• I worry because I’ve been driving on a flat-ish tire for the past week because I can’t scrape together 4 quarters. Worry uses spoons.
 
(This is the part where I felt I ran out of spoons.)
 
• Then, I am reminded that I upped my 401(k) contribution, then I have to go and rearrange my carefully crafted plan. Rearranging uses spoons.

 

---

• Having the presence of mind to be obsessive is a blessing. I am grateful for my presence of mind.
• Having the energy to hate things is a blessing. I am grateful for my energy.
• Having the ability to carefully craft a plan of action is a blessing. I am grateful for the ability to carefully craft a plan of action.
• Having the energy to feel like things are out of control is a blessing. I am grateful for my energy.
• Having the energy to worry about a flat-ish tire is a blessing. I am grateful for my energy.
• Having the desire to verify my funds lead to the discovery that my paycheck was less than I thought it was. This led to determination to rearrange the carefully crafted plan, so it would still work. These are blessings. I am grateful for my desire, my curiosity, and my determination.

 

Now, I’m going to the bathroom to cry, because I was able to remind myself how great I am and all the talents I have. I am grateful to know that I have more energy than I ever realized.