February 6, 2015.
I want to remember it. It was such a big day for me.
I want to remember it. It was such a big day for me.
I had scheduled my initial consult with therapist for that day! I had been needing to find a replacement therapist for my anxiety and depression. I struck out with the first recommended therapist, so I asked her for a recommendation. I was looking for someone who was kink +, poly +, sex +, and familiar with gender identity issues, in addition to helping me with my anxiety and depression.
In looking for, contacting, and scheduling with my new therapist, I had made a decision. I was following through on my desire to explore testosterone therapy to fulfill my desire to match my body with my gender identity. I feel very in the middle of the spectrum, and I want my body to reflect that more than it currently does.
I didn’t expect that I would be so excited about this prospect. Now that I have acknowledged that I am headed in that direction, I feel lighter and almost airy.
I am curious about the changes I will undergo; I know everyone is different. I understand that I am likely to develop more body hair, a deeper voice, a bigger clit/cock. I wonder what will MY changes look like? I am looking forward to my path to the middle. Who knows? I might even accept “they” as my personal pronoun.
In looking for, contacting, and scheduling with my new therapist, I had made a decision. I was following through on my desire to explore testosterone therapy to fulfill my desire to match my body with my gender identity. I feel very in the middle of the spectrum, and I want my body to reflect that more than it currently does.
I didn’t expect that I would be so excited about this prospect. Now that I have acknowledged that I am headed in that direction, I feel lighter and almost airy.
I am curious about the changes I will undergo; I know everyone is different. I understand that I am likely to develop more body hair, a deeper voice, a bigger clit/cock. I wonder what will MY changes look like? I am looking forward to my path to the middle. Who knows? I might even accept “they” as my personal pronoun.
I also think that walking with my gender will help alleviate some of my depression and anxiety, making it even easier to recover.
***last minute addition: on February 16, 2015 I sent a message to my PCP asking about testosterone therapy. The Vancouver Clinic does not provide this type of care.
February 18, 2015, I reached out to a friend and got the name of a doctor. I contacted the doctor but she isn't accepting new patients. She pointed me to a list from Basic Rights Oregon. I looked up the doctors on my insurance website and found a match. AND that match is taking new patients! I have an initial appointment in less than a month!***
What is your experience with non-binary transition? Please share in the comments.
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